How To Be Yourself With Confidence

There’s a lot of fluffy material out in the internet world about “discovering who you are” or “staying true to your authentic self” – but what does that even mean and why do I need to do it?! Keep on reading and you’ll find out what happens when you don’t make the time for some self-discovery. (*hint hint* it has to do with your confidence)

To boil it down, when you don’t know yourself, you allow everyone else – family, friends, society, culture – to tell you who you are and dictate how you need to be, and what your values are.

Here are two examples:

1. Our culture celebrates riches. Have a big house, drive a nice car, spend money on things. These are all tangible material items. If I don’t know who I am or my values, then I will perceive the value of “gaining riches” as my own.

I then place my worthiness and value in how many rich tangible items I have (or do not have) in possession. *Important note – there is nothing wrong with wealth and money. The problem is when it becomes an idol and it is something we feel incomplete without.

2. My family tells me I need to lose weight. Instagram, TV, pop culture, music videos, etc. all send the message that I am not good enough because I don’t look a certain way. When I didn’t know who I was, I received all the lies the world was feeding me. I hated my body, I had a low self-esteem, and I even avoided fun activities such as going to the beach or on a tubing adventure as a result of being self-conscious.

The examples could go on and on.

Ultimately, not knowing who you are creates the opportunity for you to lack confidence. You walk around feeling powerless, defeated, and insecure.

Butttttt, there’s good news! It’s never too late discover who you are and figure out how to stay true to your authentic self.

“That’s cool and all Frances, but how do I even start this process? It feels a little strange to me.”

Uh! I’m so glad you asked! 😉

A great way to get started on this journey is by using the Audaciously Me 21 Day Self-Discovery Guide. 

This guide takes you through twenty-one different exercises for your personal growth – these are actionable steps to get to know yourself!

If you’re reading this, you’ve got a willingness to change, a desire to walk confidently, and a hope knowing it’s possible to be at peace with yourself.

It takes bravery and vulnerability so it’s not a simple task. In fact, it’s not a task at all. Learning, growing, building awareness of who you are – it’s a journey. Not something you can simply check off of your “to-do list”.

As you get to know yourself, you will begin to love yourself. Many people aren’t ready to say the words “I love myself” so I encourage you to begin with this guide. Build confidence and be authentic.

Remember, love is an action and it starts with you.

Frances Estela

Frances Estela

Frances is a master’s level social worker who received her 200-hour yoga education at Yoga East in Chattanooga, TN. She is the founder of the BESO Movement, has led various support groups, and is passionate about empowering others to love. You can find her on FaceBook, Instagram, & Twitter @FrancesEstela or email her at

Are you lacking confidence and confused about who you are?
Perhaps you’re afraid of what other people will think and you don’t allow yourself to truly shine.
Let me tell ya something…

When you don’t know yourself, you allow everyone else – family, friends, society, and even pop culture – to tell you who you are. They begin to dictate your values and how you should lead your life.

Let’s put YOU back in control.

Experience self-acceptance, build confidence, and be who you were created to be.

Experience self-acceptance, build confidence, and be who you were created to be. Grab your 21 Day Guide “Audaciously Me” here.

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